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How to Start a Conversation With Your Crush in Person?

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This article was co-authored by Erika Kaplan. Erika Kaplan is a Dating Coach and Matchmaker for Three Day Rule, an exclusive matchmaking company across nine cities in the United States. With over six years of experience, Erika specializes in helping singles find quality matches through date coaching and premium matchmaking services. Erika graduated from Penn State with a Bachelors degree in Public Relations. She worked for Rolling Stone, Us Weekly, and Mens Journal before leaving publishing to pursue her passion for connecting people. Erika has been featured on Lifetime, the Philadelphia Inquirer, and CBS as well as in Thrillist, Elite Daily, Mens Health, Fast Company, and Refinery29.

For example, you might say Hi, I dont think weve actually met yet. Im Tim, hows it going? After introducing yourself, try chatting with your crush about their interests.

Or, if you have a class together, you can say So, hows your midterm paper coming together for our English class? In order to avoid awkward silences, have a few open ended, easy topics ready to talk about, like asking your crush their opinion on whats for lunch that day or if they like the new art teacher. If the small talk is going well, then move on to some deeper questions, like your crushs interests, hobbies, or work. While your crush is talking, be an active listener by repeating a few of the main ideas they talk about and avoiding interruptions to show that you care about their thoughts.

To learn how to end your conversation with your crush on a good note, keep reading! Thanks to all authors for creating a page that has been read 2,144,305 times.

How do you start a conversation with your crush?

Do you like cooking? ….Are there any books you would really recommend I read? ….What shows do you watch? ….Where do you wish you could go? ….Do you have any hobbies? ….What are some current trends you just can’t get behind? ….What was your hometown like?

What should I say to my crush to start a conversation?

Ask A Leading Question. ….Jog Their Memory. ….Say Something Sweet. ….Bring Up A Shared Interest Or Experience. ….Send An Emoji.

How do you talk to your crush in person?

Build yourself up. Remember, there is no “rejection”, only the wrong fit. ….Connect subtly. Look this person in the eye and smile. ….Be genuine. Ask your hottie a question. ….Shift connection to conversation. ….Stay in touch.

How do you greet your crush?

It may sound silly, but using your crush’s name can induce some warm fuzzy feelings right off the bat. Saying, “Hey, Brad!” sounds much more personal than “Hey!”.If you can’t make “What’s up?” flow off the tongue naturally, open with anything that feels natural to you.

What do you do when you get the urge to text that cute guy or girl you’re kind of into, but you have no legitimate reason to start a conversation? You could use a cheesy pick-up line like everyone else, but you don’t want to come across as clich. And you already know a hey or a wyd? probably wont get you very far. If your goal is to come up with conversation-starting texts to send your crush thatll grab their attention and get them so excited to chat, youve come to the right place. Sometimes, all it really takes for the object of your affections to open up is a gentle nudge in the right direction.

For example, if you recently talked about your shared love of sci-fi films or indie music , you can send them a relevant movie or song suggestion. A genuinely sweet thought is never bad, and even if the relationship doesn’t progress, your text has the potential to brighten their day.

For your first conversation with your crush to not be awkward, start the conversation by talking about something that you know he or she is interested in. This will ease the flow of words both for you and your crush because there is a topic to talk about.

However, you have to make sure that you are knowledgeable about the topic you wouldnt want to stutter or pretend you know a lot when the reality is that you dont. When we talk to the person we are attracted to, we tend to get nervous, fumble on our words, or worst, come out as aloof.

It would also feel awkward if your crush was left with nothing to say to you because of the rough flow of conversation. It can be hard to approach and start a conversation with your crush, but with the right guide, anyone can do it. Start with topics that you know will drive the conversations deeper and longer.

Find a common ground between you and your crush, even if its something trivial like your favorite ice cream flavor. A good mind-trick is to count backward from 5, and when you get to 1 just take action without thinking. Youre gonna come up with a million reasons as to why you cant do it, but if instead, youre focusing on that countdown, and youre getting ready to just propel yourself, once youre in motion, youre doing it.

If you practice talking to people, if you have go-to stories that you can rely on, and then you push yourself to not overthink things at the moment and give yourself no more than five seconds to approach them, youre gonna feel way more comfortable talking to your crush, especially when youre nervous, especially when you dont know what to say, especially when you think everythings gonna go wrong. Start with a specific question that is easy to answer and gets the conversation going. Even something silly such as what is your favorite NYC pizza spot gets the other person thinking and can quickly turn into a seamless conversation about food, restaurants, cooking, etc.

If you can find a funny meme that somehow relates to your crush, that would be ideal. This is an easy, safe, and more low-key way to show youre interested while still making them work for it. Grab a seat nearby, or post up in a spot real close.

Ask him if hes figured out what hell order if youre in line at the coffee shop. Tell her you love her fashion sense, and pick a piece, in particular, she has on you really enjoy. Dont comment on facial features or hair type, for instance.

But do comment on clothing choices, hairstyles, cool walks, neat accessories, and so on. If all else fails, remarking on your crushs really nice smile is always a good one (and my go-to backup for when nothing else springs to mind, personally). A situational opener followed by a genuine compliment is often all you need to get into a really great conversation.

Asking them for the WIFI password at a cafe, for example, is an easy way to start a conversation. Asking for a small favor, such as helping you with a work problem, gives you an excuse to talk to them. It can also lead to a natural conversation when you follow up with another question such as, How long have you been working here?

Be careful with sarcasm though, because that might put you in a negative light and make a bad first impression. One sure way to get the attention of someone youre crushing on is this; start a sincere and genuine conversation. The best way to start a conversation with your crush is to focus on something about that person.

The easiest way to start a first-time conversation with your crush is to be at the moment. These two things are necessary because theyre all youll ever need to start a conversation no matter where you are or what situation youre in. Firstly, you want to be aware of the environment because your current location provides you with a conversational topic.

You can either speak to the crush directly by saying hi followed by a simple observation that relates to your situation, or you can make a loud, outspoken comment meant to catch their eye and attention; if the crush looks at you, you use the opportunity to strike a conversation. If you bump into the crush in an aisle, perhaps block the aisle with your trolley and yourself and when they need to pass by, apologize and make conversation about how much of a klutz you tend to be when you spot things on the shelf that grab your attention. Or if you bump into the crush in a queue, loudly comment how people who check out so much grocery are just the worst (bonus points if you or the crush is currently guilty of this so you can use it as a cheeky way to start a conversation);

Or if the crush has on them a store item that you have a strong opinion on (preferably a positive, unique opinion), openly comment on what you think of such people who use the product and why this should illicit a reaction and you go into conversation from there. What all the above scenarios have in common is that they rely on whats currently taking place in front of you, hence the mantra to be in the moment .

Whether youre crushing hard on a dating app match or really miss seeing your office fling IRL, getting a convo going with someone youre romantically interested in can make anyone break into a sweat. And with the rise of online communication and online dating, theres fewer opportunities to “accidentally” bump into your crush at, say, their fave coffee shop (that they go to every Tuesday at 9 a.m.). Instead, reaching out means texting, using social media, or *gasp* calling them. (That’s still a thing, yes??)

Before you start typing, she recommends assessing your crush‘s feelings to see if there is potential for any sort of relationship: “Someone has to move this forward, right? Rest assured, they’re “all great strategies to open the door to a conversation that allows you opportunities to get to know the person you have a crush on more deeply,” says Bobby.

It’s the perfect way to get your crush to open up about their life, their furry friends, and, if they have a dog of their own, even get the ball rolling on a playdate/actual date! Maybe you can’t get enough of the “yeah, sex is cool but have you tried pizza” memes, or perhaps you favor ones related to a specific TV show or celeb. By starting a convo about any popular TV show, you’ll either end up discussing how much both of you are obsessed with it or convince them to watch an episode with you sometime.

Maybe your fave foodie shared a pic of the meal they just had at a new restaurant in town or that vegan blogger you love just released a mac ‘n’ cheese recipe that is supposed to blow your mind. Maybe last time you talked they told you about taking a family weekend trip to Maine or planning a special dinner with friends. Make sure they’ve already expressed mutual interest so you don’t end up hiding under your covers all Saturday due to embarrassment.

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Reference something he or she likes

For your first conversation with your crush to not be awkward, start the conversation by talking about something that you know he or she is interested in. This will ease the flow of words both for you and your crush because there is a topic to talk about.However, you have to make sure that you are knowledgeable about the topic – you wouldn’t want to stutter or pretend you know a lot when the reality is that you don’t.

Show genuine interest

When we talk to the person we are attracted to, we tend to get nervous, fumble on our words, or worst, come out as aloof. The other party might dismiss you as someone uninterested or boring.The best way to come across as interesting is by being interested yourself. Don’t ask the standard questions such as

Use “how” and “why” questions

Doing this will encourage your crush to open up to you. Avoid questions that can be answered with yes or no, it would be difficult to keep the conversation going if you do that. It would also feel awkward if your crush was left with nothing to say to you because of the rough flow of conversation.

Sometimes, when we’re crushing on someone, it can be a struggle to approach and talk to them. Our nerves get the best of us. We stutter. We never know what to say or what to do. It can be hard to approach and start a conversation with your crush, but with the right guide, anyone can do it.Here are 3 tips to start a conversation with your crush:

Use the right conversation starters

You won’t be able to start a conversation with your crush without the right conversation starters. Sometimes you ask questions and the answers are just a yes or no. Never do that. Start with topics that you know will drive the conversations deeper and longer.

Don’t overthink

We get nervous because we overthink the exchange. We get ahead of ourselves. Don’t do it if you want to be successful. Don’t overthink anything and just go with the flow.

Find a common ground

The best way to connect with someone is to find common interests. You’ll have endless things to talk about if you both talk about the things you’re passionate about. Find a common ground between you and your crush, even if it’s something trivial like your favorite ice cream flavor. It’s a good starting point.Remember not to let your nerves get the best of you. It takes a good amount of courage. Don’t be afraid to be rejected because it’s always part of the experience. What’s important is that you remember to have fun and be yourself always.

Smile and eye contact

A smile goes a long way when trying to talk to anyone for the first time. It immediately makes you seem more approachable while putting the other person at ease. If you smile and make eye contact, there is a good chance your crush may start the conversation before you even get the chance to.

Start with a question

Don’t just say hi and have the other person take it from there. Start with a specific question that is easy to answer and gets the conversation going. Even something silly such as

Show or send a funny meme

Starting a conversation on a funny note sets the light-hearted tone that you’re looking for in that first-ever conversation. If you can find a funny meme that somehow relates to your crush, that would be ideal.

Respond to an IG story

This is an easy, safe, and more low-key way to show you’re interested while still making them work for it. You just made the subtle first move, let’s see if he/she takes the bait.

Proximity first

Well, first thing’s first: you need proximity. Hard to chat your crush up from across the room. And it’s awkward doing it online (I know it feels less intimidating… but you really want to do it in person).The good news is a lot of times crushes are reciprocal, and your crush may just get close to you too! So sometimes this part handles itself. If not though, you’re going to need to find a reason to get close.Or you may not need one; ever notice how sometimes your crush just ‘appears’ next to you? Well… you can do that too. Grab a seat nearby, or post up in a spot real close. Act like you’re looking around a little bit and just ‘happened’ to find that spot.

Situational relevance

Once you’re there, you’ll need a reason to start a conversation.Make a comment about the environment. Ask her how she did in that last test if you’re in class. Ask him if he’s figured out what he’ll order if you’re in line at the coffee shop. Ask her if she’s going anywhere exciting if you’re waiting for the bus or train.

Genuine compliment

You can either open with this, or add it after your opener. But often it’s helpful to make a genuine compliment. What’s a genuine compliment? It’s a compliment you give someone about something you genuinely like.Does he have legitimately stylish hair? Tell him he’s got the trimmest hair you’ve seen all day. Did you take one look at this girl the way she’s dressed and go “Wow”? Tell her you love her fashion sense, and pick a piece, in particular, she has on you really enjoy.Choose items your crush chose, rather than things your crush was born with. Don’t comment on facial features or hair type, for instance. But do comment on clothing choices, hairstyles, cool walks, neat accessories, and so on.If all else fails, remarking on your crush’s “really nice smile” is always a good one (and my go-to backup for when nothing else springs to mind, personally).

Ask for help

If you want to strike up a conversation with your crush, ask them for help with something.Asking them for the WIFI password at a cafe, for example, is an easy way to start a conversation. If they’re also interested, they’ll jump on the opportunity to talk to you. Another classic example is asking someone for a lighter, then following it up with another question.
It takes out the awkwardness of introducing yourself for no reason. It can also lead to a natural conversation when you follow up with another question such as, “How long have you been working here?”

Step One: Vibe check.

“It’s important to be extremely thoughtful and cautious about announcing your feelings to someone you have a crush on,” Bobby advises. Instead, the first step is to see if they pass a “vibe check” and reciprocate your romantic interest. In that case, these are the perf convo starters.

Send them a pic of your dog.

Talking about pets makes everyone happy. As soon as you send a pic of your adorable pup, they’ll be sure to respond with “😍” and “when can I meet them?” It’s the perfect way to get your crush to open up about their life, their furry friends, and, if they have a dog of their own, even get the ball rolling on a playdate/actual date!Research shows pets are playing more of a factor in dating life. After all, they aren’t just cuddly companions, they’re part of your family. Women are particularly discriminating when it comes to a potential partner’s association with a pet. Noted!

Send a meme or a funny video.

Chances are, if you have a phone, you have a favorite type of meme. Maybe you can’t get enough of the “yeah, sex is cool but have you tried pizza” memes, or perhaps you favor ones related to a specific TV show or celeb. No matter your meme speed, try sending one to your crush and see if they pass the vibe check by noting how they react.If you’re not into memes, try online videos or TikToks. Whether it’s one of TikTok’s unbelievably cute grandparent videos or a funny one that just doesn’t make any sense, TikTok has become always appropriate to reference and share.

Talk astrology with them.

If you know your crush is into astrology, bringing it up in a cute way can help them see your love is written in the stars. If you’re lucky enough to be friends with your crush on Co-Star or another astrology app, you can check how compatible you two are or even wait for the app to suggest a day when the planets are aligned for you two. Maybe you’ll be as compatible as Olivia Wilde and Harry Styles. (Hey, go ahead and dream, dreamer.)Got a crush who doesn’t give a flying F about mercury going retrograde? Don’t fear—instead, talk about another shared interest that will spark great conversation.

DM them a foodie Insta post.

Who doesn’t love drooling over great pics of food? Maybe your fave foodie shared a pic of the meal they just had at a new restaurant in town or that vegan blogger you love just released a mac ‘n’ cheese recipe that is supposed to blow your mind.Either way, your crush is gonna want to have a meal with you—and that is the perfect segue to asking them on a date! Whether you replicate the meal at home or go out for dinner, “inviting them to spend time with you (if you feel it’s appropriate and that they are interested in doing so) is the quickest path to assess mutual interest and have the chance to get to know someone more deeply,” Bobby suggests.

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